Welcome to ICWL!

My story is pretty much explained in the timeline on the right, but I guess this might be a good time for a disclaimer. This blog started as a record of our journey through fertility treatment in China, where we've been living for nearly 4 years.

In the time since I started blogging, our story has moved on... from fertility treatment to pregnancy and soon, from China to South Korea. But, while the title of this blog might seem a little inaccurate, it's not. We're still infertile and still struggling with the hangover of the last 3 years of TTC, whilst trying to celebrate and enjoy this much-desired pregnancy.

Thank you for stopping by - if you leave a comment, I'll come and visit your blog and say Hi!

Halfway house...

I'm 5 days down with 5 more to go before my beta hcg blood test and I'm in a weird state of limbo. I haven't been blogging daily because there's nothing for me to say!  I feel fine. Great, in fact. I feel back to normal, as if I've not been through IVF at all (except perhaps for a little extra weight around my middle because of lack of exercise).

Which is weird, right? I'm so used to cycles that lead to nothing, whether natural or IUI, that it feels like I'm back there again.  Not in a particularly negative way, just in a 'well, that's done and out of the way - what's next?' kind of way.

I spent the first 3 days after transfer at home, taking it easy. I only went out to get my progesterone shots at the clinic or emergency room. Friends came over and I kept myself busy with TV, books and some of my planned time-filling projects. Unfortunately my Bloke had to be in Seoul for work so I was a bit lonely, but generally I've been doing fine. I don't feel any symptoms.. the progesterone seems to be slowing down my digestion, but I've found ways to deal with that. So I feel normal. As normal as it's possible to feel when you're a week away from immense joy or huge disappointment.

So, like this blog post, the whole experience is seriously underwhelming!  In some ways, I know this is good. I feel calmer than I have during my IUI cycle 2wws. I'm not symptom-spotting and am trying to stick to my mantra 'Nothing means anything'. This is not a depressing, fatalistic, pessimistic mantra.. it's what I've tried to live by when driving myself crazy during other 2wws and applies even more now. Basically, any 'symptoms' I do experience could be due to the meds I'm on and, in all probability, I wouldn't experience any symptoms at such an early stage, even with a positive result. So, no symptoms don't mean anything bad, anymore than a possibly imagined symptom means anything good. Does that make sense?  And I know there are women out there who do experience very early pregnancy signs and I would love to be one of them, but I'm not counting on it.

The week ahead is near-filled with fun things to do.. lunches, picnics and visits to friends. This will be the first time I've seen most people since announcing our move to Korea, so conversations should be filled with that topic. Hopefully, these will help me maintain some sense of calm and stop any potential obsessing in it's tracks. Hopefully.... ;)

The journey moves on.. literally!

The eagle-eyed amongst you might have noticed that the title of my blog has changed a little... That's because, soon, I will no longer be infertile in China... Don't get too excited, I'll still be infertile :)
But my Bloke and I are leaving the Middle Kingdom and moving to South Korea!

Surprised?! So were we!

I can't pretend that this only happened today.. my Bloke is not a diplomat / spy / hitman... he doesn't get a coded message telling him to board a flight to Moscow within the hour. A little while ago he was asked to apply for a senior position within the same company - a jump that he'd thought was too big for him to make. Of course he applied and a couple of weeks ago, he was offered the job. In Seoul. Did I mention that it's in Seoul? That's in Korea. I've never been to Korea. And every time my Bloke has returned from a business trip there, he has complained about how much he doesn't like Seoul. But the job is an amazing opportunity and the ridiculous grin on his face when he told me about it was enough for me to want it for him, as much as he wanted it.

So we're moving to Korea (did I mention that?). My Bloke just got his contract through which is why I now feel 'safe' posting this.

We shared a moment of laugh-out-loud hysteria recently when we realised what we were doing... not the move itself, but combining a move to a new city and country, a new, probably very stressful job for him with a potentially life-changing IVF cycle. In a list of stressful life events, where do you think this lot would rate?!

More on the move to come... but I'd like to take this chance to thank Kat at I'm Very Far Away for all her help, info and support so far - I gave her an advance heads-up seen as we'll be moving into her hood ;)

Right now I'm probably in stirrups or the recovery room after the egg collection. Hopefully there are a few good eggs (at least) getting down and dirty with a few (hundred thousand) fast little swimmers.... Now's not the time to be bashful, guys and girls... you know you want to...

PS: I chose this pic because how many couples manage to get through a house move with blissful smiles on their faces like these two?!