Tuesday, 18 January 2011

Sweet FA.. (Folic Acid, that is)

I finished another bottle of folic acid today... each bottle contains about a month's supply, so that makes approximately 30 little bottles of hope that I've used up since this journey started. Luckily, in China, it's very cheap so, as long as I can cope with the giggles of the shopgirls when I replenish my supply in 6 month batches, it's a minor expense and inconvenience in comparison to everything else.

But it's another symbol of how long this is taking.. of how many months I've tracked my cycle and counted the days waiting for my period to arrive, only to be disappointed. Today I'm still in the same boat. Today I woke up with 'normal-sized' boobs after days of swollen, aching ones. Today I had spotting again after nothing at all yesterday. Today I have that sad, tired feeling that always preceeds my period (or at least, the sadness that has been there since starting this journey). Today I have a serious desire to make chocolate brownies or chocolate cupcakes, or perhaps a pasta dish with lots of cream and cheese followed by chocolate cupcakes...

Looks like I'll be waiting a little bit longer. Please let 2011 be my year!

4 comments:

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  2. Oops typo.....30 empty bottles is quite a powerful image. It's a rotten time. If this cycle does not finish in a happy ending then (it may not be any consolation) but other future fertility treatments will raise the odds significantly. I feel for you today and hope you will indulge in the food your body is craving x

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  3. Thanks... went for risotto in the end, followed by homemade chocolate brownies with dark chocolate orange ice-cream :)

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  4. Sounds like the perfect meal to nurse a bad ending. I hope you are looking after yourself!

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